Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Kick in the Teeth? NAH.

Well hey there, hi there! So my apologies for the lack of enthusiasm in yesterday's post. By the time I wrote it, I had been up for about 14 hours and was waiting to catch a plane which ended up being delayed, then had a rather adventurous cab ride home. The upside to all of this was that I met someone new(ish) at work and had a super good chat on the plane ride home. I got the name of a few books to read and some new music to check out - both of those things always make me happy! I'm still tired today but feel a renewed sense of productivity and happiness! :)

So, I read this post today and it really made me sit back and go, "hmmmmm.....". I feel that it's articulated some of the things that I've really been thinking about when I've been looking at my life and how it's changed in the last year. The guy who writes this fancy little blog says,
"What seems like horror, terror or really bad luck is the event that we needed in order to heal our wounds, step out into our power and then use our experience, strength and hope to help other people come out of their darkness. Grace can feel like a soft feather and sometimes Grace can be a kick in the teeth (or worse)." (find it here)

I've had people say to me, "Kyla, you've had it hard", "Wow, you've gone through a lot for someone your age" (I'm 28 if it matters), etc. etc. I have to admit, while I appreciate the recognition of the fact that I've had some challenges and my feelings are validated in some sense; I strongly dislike those statements. I really do. Don't get me wrong - sometimes I have a crappy day and I sit and feel sorry for myself. I feel sorry for losing my brother and my dad before I got the full length of life with them. I feel sorry for not having the most perfect career path. I feel sorry for losing friends. I feel sorry for not saying the nicest things all the time. I feel sorry for not being "perfect" or "enough" or whatever the crappy thought might be for that crappy day, but really - at the end of the day... I don't look at my life and think, "Yes, you're right. I have had it hard." In fact, I generally try to look at those experiences and see what I've got out of them. I'm still working on coming to peace with losing my dad but I can tell you the things that I have noticed that are slllllooooowly coming out of the wood work are mostly positive things. They are valuable lessons I've needed to learn and I'm not sure I would have learned them any other way or maybe I would have had to wait longer. I've learned so much about myself and I've learned so much about my own inner strength. Sometimes being strong can be a very lonely place and at the same time very empowering - a shout out to my BFF in the world, Andi for being such a great example of a strong woman. I look to her for a lot of inspiration.

Anyway, I've started rambling here, but really - I think my whole point is,*t happens, but what you do with that sh*t is up to you. How you react is up to you. You can let it make you, or you can let is break you. My wise words for the day. BAM.

LOVE TO ALL! More recipes to come my friends... I've got a baking date with Lisa this weekend. I can't wait! xo

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